Encourage and Equip

Dear Nicole, I am truly sorry that I have disappointed you and that you feel that I did nothing for you. I do apologize for being late for our appointments. I am trying to improve. Beyond that, your review seems to focus on two key areas. First, that you felt that I did nothing for you and secondly that you felt scammed. First, perhaps, I did not clearly explain my recommendations to you at our last meeting. Instead of any “quick-fix solution”, I recommended a two-fold strategy which I detail below. Second, since I met with you folks for over seven hours and only charged you for three hours and gave you three books without charge, I am at a loss to understand how that appears to be a scam. Please allow me to reply to both concerns. FIRST: Regarding what I tried to do. Based on our times together, I recommended a two-fold strategy. 1. to build up the spiritual strength using a combination of Scripture readings and my book designed to develop a more consistent prayer experience. 2. to develop practical relationship skills using a program comprised of a hardcover book, a video series and discussion of each chapter. I offered to meet with you folks weekly but also suggested that if you wanted to save the expense that you could work through the program on your own. I offered to be available for phone or email conversations or monthly meetings if that would be helpful. As I understood, we agreed that you both would follow my recommendations for two weeks after which we would meet again to evaluate progress and effectiveness. During that time, I said that I would continue to review my notes to see if I might have other recommendations or insights worth sharing. I must admit that I felt hurt by the comment that I did nothing for you when my recommendations were not even given a chance. SECOND: Regarding my integrity. I attempted to provide excellent care without undue expense. Although I was more concerned about your relationship than my own finances, somehow, I gave you the opposite impression causing you to feel that I scammed you. 1. I quoted an hourly rate and then offered a package deal of four hours for a little less than the cost of three. We actually spent more than seven hours together and I never even hinted at any additional fees. Beyond that, I offered to meet for a two-week follow up without charge. 2. I’m not sure how I offended you by giving you both free copies of my book. I spent time going through the contents of the book to explain why I was recommending it for you. Somehow that felt that I was promoting the book. 3. I also left my copy of the other book—again without any charge. I even suggested ways that the accompanying video series might be accessible without charge. CONCLUSION: Your initial quote listed your counseling goals as “Communication, Conflict resolution, Trust”. Relationships are messy. No quick fix will effectively address those goals. The program that I recommended is aimed at achieving those goals and has a very impressive track record. If you and Steve are willing to give my recommendations an honest try, I am willing to keep our next appointment (at no charge, as agreed) to discuss progress toward those goals and to assess the program as we had agreed. If you feel that this is all a waste of time or a scam, I will initiate a full refund. Please let me know if this is acceptable. If you would like to talk privately about any of this, please feel free to call or email.