Wesleyville Baptist Church

Introduction: Out of a deeply heartfelt concern for the marital union and desire to honor God's word, we realize marriage is intended to be life's long commitment (Ecclesiastes 5:1-5 and Matthew 19:5-6). We realize God desires each marriage to be an example of Jesus' own relationship with the church, His bride (Ephesians 5:21-33). Therefore, we require the following: (1) We insist on two pre-marriage counseling sessions with every couple before any commitment is made on the part of the pastor of our church to participate in that marriage (no final details can be made until the third session). It is desirable to start counseling before engagement or at least 6 months before the purposed wedding date. (2) Only believers or those with open hearts will be united in holy matrimony (2 Corinthians 6:14-18). (3) Those who are outside the fellowship of this church must meet the above requirements and be approved by the deacons as well. (4) Because the scripture recognizes remarriage as legitimate under certain circumstances (Matthew 19:9 and 1 Corinthians 7), divorced individuals must have (in addition to the requirements for every marriage) worked through their own responsibility in the particular divorce and must evidence a proper spirit before the issue of remarriage will be discussed. (5) In extenuating circumstances, we, as in every case, desire to show God's grace and mercy whenever possible, yet the desired spirit must be in evidence. Preparations for a Healthy Marriage (Psalm 127:1) Do the following: 1. Read one chapter per day together of Psalms, The Gospels, and Proverbs. 2. Purchase and read according to counseling schedule -- Preparing for Marriage by David Boehl, Brent Nelson, Jeff Schulte and Lloyd Shadrach. (You may purchase the book from the church.) 3. Participate fully in all counseling sessions. Our concern is for you to get to know each other's heart, soul, and personality as well as possible prior to marriage. It is to this end that you are expected to follow through with the work listed above. It is required. I reserve the right to refuse to marry any individuals who, I believe, are unable to have a successful marriage. I will be able to indicate that by our third session together. We generally meet seven times. The last of seven meetings will be the wedding ceremony planning session. The other meetings will deal with the following: (1) Discovering that marriage is God's idea and how that fact affects the relationship between a husband and wife (2) God's plan for marriage involving receiving your mate as His provision, leaving behind your dependence and allegiance to parents, cleaving solely to your mate and becoming one flesh (3) Learning the important aspects of listening, expressing yourselves and resolving conflicts in order to enhance communication and encourage intimacy in your marriage (4) Learning the biblical roles for husbands and wives and how to implement them in your marriage (5) Discovering how to base your financial goals and decisions on the fact that God owns everything, as we are all only stewards of His resources (6) Learning that sex is part of God's plan to develop complete physical, emotional and spiritual intimacy between a husband and wife These classes are for your benefit. The more you put into them, the more prepared you will be. So, please ask questions, and ask if we fail to deal with any area that concerns you.